The one thing all successful people have in common
How your mindset determines your success in life.
It’s difficult to find a common trait among successful people.
Some are kind. Some are cruel. Some have miserable family lives and others have happy family lives.
Many work out, wake up early and follow a strict diet. Others sleep in, never see a gym and eat whatever they want.
Many preach grinding, hustling away, working endless hours and never having time for anything else. Others talk about work-life balance and the importance of maintaining relationships in their family lives.
Some do it alone and others together. They could be athletes, writers, business people or even celebrities.
But despite all these differences, they all have one thing in common.
A belief that they can.
These successful people all believe that whatever they are moving towards, whatever they dream of, they can achieve it.
They may have some other motivations driving them forward, and they may approach their journey to achieve their goal differently, but the one thing they all have is that they believe they can.
They believe it enough to overcome self-doubt. And they believe it enough to take action.
This may sound like quite a stupid observation. of course they believe they can do it. Otherwise, it wouldn’t happen. Everybody knows this.
But take note when you listen to the unsuccessful people around you, those who always seem unhappy and seem to never catch a break. Listen to the way they speak.
“I can’t”
“That’s not possible”
“I wish”
The average person limits their capabilities by limiting what they think they can do.
It is in our basic nature to feel as though we simply have things done to us. As though life is coming in our direction.
And if you believe this, of course, it will be true. Why would you even try to do anything if you are predetermined to be whatever you are based on the circumstances of your life? It allows you to pass the blame.
Nothing bad is ever your fault, but on the same note your destiny is already written and there's nothing you can do about it.
This rears its ugly head in a victim mentality, where people blame everything other than themselves for the way their life has played out. Even if it may be true, even if you have been dealt what can only be seen as a shit hand. This mindset does you no favours. It completely limits what you can be in life. And it completely limits what you are capable of because you remove the onus, the control from your hand and place it into the hand of your environment.
But as Jack Nicholson’s character said in the opening line of The Departed: “I don’t want to be a product of my environment, I want my environment to be a product of me”
A truly evil character giving a very sound piece of advice. You are going to be stuck in your small town where nothing happens if you don’t move out or actively try to change it. You’re going to continue to be a loser who does drugs every day and wastes away playing video games if you don’t do something about it and stop hanging out with people who waste their time doing the same thing. You have to take control and be in charge of what goes on around you in life and that begins with understanding the fundamental truth that you can take control and change your life. But you have to stop making excuses as to why you can’t.
“No one gives it to you, you have to take it” Another line from the same monologue.
And this is the mentality that every successful person I have met in life has. And the mindset that all who live in mediocrity lack.
The people who do well all inevitably believe they can. They take action, get things done and succeed more often than not. Because they don’t mentally limit themselves, and those who often lead unhappy, unfulfilled lives are the ones who never try because they dont think anything is possible and believe all circumstances are determined by outside sources.
And then these people are often heard complaining. Saying that the government does this to them, and their parents did that. And their boss is mean to them and nothing is working in their favour. But what are they doing to change it?
Absolutely nothing.
Now, by no means are you guaranteed to be successful in every endeavour you pursue just because you believe in it. You likely may not succeed. Outside circumstances may impact the eventual outcome of your goal. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. The likelihood of you succeeding by believing it is possible, putting in your best effort and acting fast makes you exponentially more likely to succeed than if you think you can’t so you don’t even bother trying.
And with enough belief and enough attempts you will definitely and naturally succeed. But it's only by believing that you can do whatever you put your mind to can become true.
But how can you build up this mindset?
How can you change your mind to believe that you are capable of whatever you put your mind to?
By getting small wins.
With enough small wins, you will completely change the way your brain looks at problems. You won’t see the events in your life as unstoppable raging rivers, but rather as dams that can be built if you just put down enough sticks and stones.
These need to be the most likely guaranteed forms of relatively fast success that require a somewhat decent amount of effort. Because if it comes too easy you take it for granted. Beating levels on video games doesn’t change the way your mind operates and doesn’t fix your problems in life. Many people who struggle with a fixed, negative mindset are gamers.
As I have said before, the best way to change your life is by getting in shape.
It is easy to look at yourself and see if you are out of shape, yes you can blame genetics and say it’s out of your control, but that's what we’re trying to fix. It isn’t out of your control, it's completely within your control.
Without a shadow of a doubt, if you eat well, train hard and remain consistent, you will change your body.
If you get enough protein and move a bunch of weight you will get bigger muscles.
When you see these results, and you will see them, you will understand that with deliberate planned effort, you can change not just your body but the circumstances of your life.
And these positive thoughts and mindsets will spill across and you will start to win in other aspects of life. If you’re a student you will find yourself studying harder and improving your grades. If you’re shy with women you will understand that you aren’t unworthy and that by talking to women and getting to know them you will grow your social muscles and become better with the opposite sex. And if you have had dreams of starting a business you will realise that it is possible, that you can succeed and you aren’t sure to fail. This will help you hone in, take action and succeed.
Now this mindset won’t stay permanently without effort. You need to stay aware and catch yourself if you begin slipping. I often find myself drifting between a positive mindset and a negative one and if I’m not careful I spend more time thinking life happens to me instead of it coming from me. So stay aware and never forget that you can do whatever you believe you can.
You are just as capable of succeeding as everyone else who ever has. The only difference is that they have believed in themselves enough to try, but now you can too.
Goodluck and godspeed.